I must have been very proud of my efforts because I invited people over.
The girl on the left is Celeste. She and I waited tables together at Hobeaus, a fish restaurant in NY that served dead lobsters along with live ones in a two for one sale. Only no one knew about the one dead lobster. Beware of all two for one sales.
The guy next to her is Chris. He and I went to the same university in Paris and his father was the German Ambassador to France. His brother Karl de-virginized me. And broke my heart in a million pieces. Chris now lives in Berlin and is a very successful psychoanalyst. I hope Karl is his patient and discusses how he should be forever punished for breaking my heart. Their mother made me get on birth control pills.
The guy who appears to be leaning into my boobs? I HAVE NO IDEA WHO THAT IS.
I had Christmas trees growing up, of course, but my parents never mentioned the downside to owning one and it's just one more thing I get to blame them for in therapy. Those things leak needles. I found them years later, hiding in the cracks of wooden floor boards, in the cushions of my couch and in my cereal.
When I moved to L.A. 13 years later, I found some under one of my rugs.
